It Starts Inside.

She sat down on her windowsill and looked up at the night sky. The stars shined. The moon was full and bright. She asked the planets to align, to show her a sign. She begged for guidance. Patience. Some kind …

Resuscitation Revaluation

I used to think drama would resuscitate me.

Seal the voids, saturate the silence and fill the empty spaces inside me.

I thought a little fire would reignite my life.

But after a while the fire started burning so hot, I wasn’t sure whether it was burning hot or turned to ice.

My patience ran out, with far too many questions and doubts and I found what I suspected.

Certainly swept of my feet but with no intention of catching me, he knew I’d hit the ground any second but turned around and neglected, not even tempted to save me.

My patience ran weary, the desire grew dreary and the passion was only passionate in the beginning.

Yes, my senses were stimulated, my nerves damaged my brain imbalanced and now I don’t know if I can manage my own will.

Days turned to weeks, to months, too fast but felt as if time were standing still.

I lost myself in him and then I lost myself through him, and now I cant find myself at all and fear my favorite part of myself is lost forever.

Imprisoned by his game, betrayed and ashamed, some of my worst times have been times we spent together.

I thought he’d bring me back to life but I couldn’t feel more dead.

I don’t want the drama; just bring me back the kind of love you die for, not fight for and I’ll never take it for granted again.

-Erika Fuego

The Human Race.

I am but a human

Living in my humanness

Worried about my gas, my rent and cigarettes.

I am only a human

Living in my human ways

Working 9-5 day after day with no significant change.

I am a simple human

Living amongst the human race

Worried about my weight and the wrinkles on my face.

I am only a human

Existing through my human phase

Who only worries about tomorrow and can’t wait to finish the day.

I am but a mere human who awakens by the buzzing of my alarm clock

Late to work again

Rushing past the strangers on the sidewalk.

I am only a human that throws wrappers out of my window to keep my car clean.

A human who is enslaved to always wanting, always needing and can’t find relief.

A human who’s always reaching, always thinking but cannot simply be.

Just a human with suppressed pain and suffering that cannot be released.

I am but a mere human trapped in my humaneness, yearning for success.

Concerned with what lies ahead but not with the present.

I am only a human who answers when my cell phone rings.

An ordinary human who wishes for the finer things.

Another human, who can’t spare change for the beggar on the street

because my money belongs to me.

A mere human that never has enough time, love or money.

Glued to a laptop and television screen.

I am but a mere human, saving up for plastic surgery.

Just a human with a wine bottle that’s half empty.

Unhappy and unhealthy.

I look into the mirror and a human is what I see.

& I guess I’m doing just fine, although my soul is on its knees.

But I’m just a mere human so I’ll keep living in my human ways, existing in my human phase.

I’m sure this is what God intended when he created the human race.

– Erika Fuego

Hide & Seek

I’ve been searching for you my entire life.

Someone who spoons with me and won’t turn away from me in the middle of the night.